Hell Mom, Damian & Raccoon Boy: 32 Hours on Amtrak

The Idea: Take Amtrak from Portland to L.A.


The Reasons:

1. Save Money, to fly with Ruby Jean (my bike) the total cost would be about $500. To take Amtrak with Ruby Jean is $120.
2. Taking RJ on the train does not require disassembly and assembly saving time and worry.
3. The train would provide for a relaxing time to decompress prior to the ride.

The Reality:
I did save money and the bike is in one piece BUT…

The train is full of “characters”, many who look as if they have had multiple appearances on COPS.

Across the aisle from me were a bleach blonde “hell mom” and her 2 year old son. I’m reasonably certain that the child, who I will call Damian, could spin his head around in a full circle. This devil child was an Olympic quality seat bouncer and could win any county fair Hollein’ Contest. The more that Lil' Devil Boy screamed the more that "hell mom" buried herself into her Cosmo magazine and sucked on her Budweiser.

My seatmate, Al, was a great guy. Al is retired Navy with 4 kids “a southy” from the south side of Boston. Al freely offered suggestions to "hell mom" on how to quiet Damian, his advice fell on deaf ears.

Al offered up a great deal of Boston history and had some great stories about his Navy days and it was a real treat to have him as a travel partner.

For entertainment we had “raccoon boy”, he was a walking tattoo with raccoon makeup around his eyes. He explained that the raccoon makeup kept negative energy from entering his soul. Here are a few other things we learned while eavesdropping on raccoon boy who was sitting behind us:

1. He is opposed to comfort. Comfort is for the weak.
2. The 8 legged octopus stuffed toy that he carries is magical.
3. Ink is evil. Books are evil. Ink steals the truth and truth can only be spoken.
4. His 3 string dulcimer is the perfect musical instrument. Yes, he gave a demonstration.
5. Humans and Bacteria are equal. Bacteria need protection from man.

I will miss Raccoon Boy.

Coast Starlight

The train ride from Portland to L.A. was 32 hours.I'm not sure that I would want to do it again.

The highlights that don't include Hell Mom, Damian, Raccoon Boy or the drunk skinhead from New Zealand who was tossed from the train into the waiting arms of the local police 300 miles short of his planned destination of L.A are.....

The scenery over the mountains was fantastic, the sky was clear and the snow was fresh and deep.

The people that I had meals with were really great, everyone had great stories from Caroline who had just retired and was off on adventure to Tony & Ron who were on their way to see their elderly parents.

There was Kim who was taking the train to L.A for "awhile" until she heads to Belize to finish construction on her new home.

People are what make for great adventures and this adventure is about to begin.

Dream BIG, Jeff